Today marks my 2 week mark - DAY 14! I can't believe I've made it this far. It's recommended that this diet is done in 3 stages for 3 months, but with our upcoming trip overseas I could only do it for 6 weeks. The first 4 weeks are the most strict, so in 2 more weeks I'll be allowed to start (carefully) reintroducing some foods (like POTATOES!) I seriously cannot wait to have a sweet potato and mashed potatoes again!
I would be lying if I said this hasn't been a rough 14 days. I forgot to mention the 2 other things I was diagnosed with before starting this diet - a seratonin deficiency (which can cause depression and problems sleeping) and adrenal fatigue (which causes all sorts of crazy problems with your emotions/anger/etc). So, you can just imagine the kind of mess I am with these emotional problems PLUS this diet!
Almost every day since starting this diet I have felt like I'm on a rollercoaster. I go from being "ok", to being so frustrated that I cry (because I can't have things I want to eat, or because my food is so bland I just don't want to eat at all). Or, I get angry, because I'm starving and there's nothing "easy" or "quick" to fix. Maybe that sounds childish, but on a typical day I have to deprive myself around 50 times a day from what I want. Meals, snacks, drinks, gum - they are all subject to my diet.
Every commercial that comes on TV gives me cravings for things I can't have. And leaving the house is even harder - you just don't realize how many times a day you are exposed to FOOD! I literally see thousands of things I can't have - between restaurants on the side of the road and food in the grocery store. I have had the "sample ladies" at Publix trying to convince me to try their food. I had to walk past the donuts and coffee at church on Sunday morning, and turn down friends' invitations to go out to lunch. There is even chocolate candy at the check out line in Hobby Lobby! I told Rusty that I'm afraid someday he's going to get a phone call from Publix, telling him I've "snapped" and that he'll find me crying in the floor of the chocolate aisle eating candy and drinking a coke!
I think the most frustrating thing to me though, is the fact that I ate healthy BEFORE this diet. I keep reading about how most people with this issue live off fast food and sweets, and everyone keeps telling me how much better I'm going to feel when I eat the "diet food" (ie - no sweets, no processed food, etc). But when I explained my normal eating habits to my chiropractor the other day, he was floored!
See, I used to be the girl who ate fast food multiple times a week and candy all the time... but 3 years ago I started making some drastic changes. While we may eat fast food when we're traveling, or overseas for "comfort food", it is not a staple in our diet. When we're home and in a normal schedule, we usually don't even eat fast food once a month! I cook at home 95% of the time. We bake chicken, turkey, and occasionally fish, shrimp or beef with FRESH vegetables (not canned). I cook with olive oil and fresh garlic. We don't eat bread with dinner and I only make sweets for special occasions. I also don't drink caffeine.
To be honest, I'm angry that I'm sick - considering how hard I was working to take care of myself. And I'm angry that this diet makes me want candy and cookies and other "bad for me" things (just because I can't have them!) considering the healthy choices that I typically make about sweets. I'm afraid I'm going to splurge on all this when I get off this diet (which could cause a relapse). Part of me wishes I'd never changed my diet from all the fast food and candy - because it seems I have more health issues now!
I'm also really angry about everything I'm missing. Because of all the "special" food I have to eat (that all has to be cooked by ME), I am pretty much under "house arrest". I can't eat any meals out, and all my food has to be refrigerated... which means I have to be home for 3 meals a day. I also get tired really easily (probably from the lack of carbs) and sometimes my medicine makes me sick. So, we're having to miss SO much! We had to cancel our annual trip to the Auburn vs Arkansas game - which is a "Jackson Family Tradition" we look forward to all year. We also had to cancel a trip to a conference in Georgia we were excited about, and today I'm missing a bridal shower for one of my dearest friends. And we won't even talk about the fact that I can't go to Auburn, or home to visit my family! I just want my life back!
Okay... okay... enough of my venting (see, I told you I'm on an emotional roller-coaster!) Sorry! I didn't mean to make this all "Debby Downer"! But for those of you who've asked how I'm doing - there it is!
But - the GOOD NEWS is - I've made it through 14 days without cheating even ONCE! *high five!* And although I've found a lot of food I hate, I've also found some meals that are actually ok. For those of you that are curious, I'll try to share a blog on what I've been eating in the next couple of days.
Of course, the GREAT NEWS is - I have some of the BEST friends in the whole world! I'm afraid without them, that I would only be having "down" days. But it's hard to stay down all the time when so many people are encouraging you! I've had girlfriends calling to check on me, lots of friends and blog readers emailing suggestions, recipe ideas, and encouraging words, (seriously, you guys are the best!) tons of people praying for me, and one friend even sent a gift!
As I mentioned earlier, we had to cancel our annual trip to the Auburn vs Arkansas game. We'd been planning all sorts of fun for the weekend and looking forward to it for over a year, so we were both seriously bummed about missing it. But the day of the game (as we were moping around) a present came in the mail!
Now, if you know me, then you know that I LOVE surprises!!! And this one was especially thoughtful...
And it came with this note...
Seriously?! How could we stay bummed after a gift like this? It was a great reminder of how blessed I am to have friends like Katie in my life! (thanks Katie!)
Now that I'm this far in, I am bound and determined to finish this diet! Please just keep praying that God will give me the strength and will-power to stay on track, and that He will HEAL me of all these issues! And, while you're at it, please pray for my husband, who has to put up with my rollercoaster of emotions during this diet!
Hi Erika-
ReplyDeleteThere is a blog of a lady that I read periodically that fought adrenal fatigue last year. She posted a lot on the journey. I am attaching the link to her blog. Maybe it will help you.
The Adrenal Fatigue blog: http://hemakesmeliedownajourneyofhealing.blogspot.com/
Her regular blog: http://shelookethwell.blogspot.com/
I'm not sure who posted this, but I appreciate it! Can't wait to check out that blog! :)
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